On the grand Connecticut cannabis carousel, the powers that be have crowned a new ringmaster to tame the wild beasts of bureaucracy and give voice to the voiceless greenery aficionados. Enter Erin Gorman Kirk, the freshly minted Cannabis Ombudsman, a title so rare it might as well be a unicorn in the land of Uncle Sam.
With a salary that could make a Wall Street banker blush, our hero sets forth with a mission to be the “vigilant guardian of patient interests,” ensuring that the palliative puffery aligns with the highest standards of care and compassion. Ah, the nobility of it all! One can only hope that the cannabis-consuming constituency will find solace in the knowledge that their champion will actively engage with all stakeholders to improve the palliative marijuana market.
As the first of her kind in the nation, Ms. Kirk’s appointment as a beacon of hope for those navigating the hazy corridors of medical marijuana management, all while pocketing a cool $130,000 a year.
This is too weird,
