Strap yourselves in, dear readers, because Connecticut’s cannabis saga reads like a Shakespearean tragedy with a hint of farce. The state, once synonymous with steady habits, now proudly boasts a whopping 27 cannabis dispensaries – a number multiplying faster than rabbits in spring. It’s almost as if they believe the more dispensaries, the merrier. And why not? Who needs caution when you’re diving headfirst into the wild world of cannabis?
Oh, but here’s the punchline: until recently, the state could only boast four cannabis cultivators, a number so exclusive it’s practically the VIP section of a nightclub. Four. That’s right, four. As in the number of seasons, the tires on your average sedan, or the number of horsemen of the apocalypse. You get the picture. Because who needs variety when it comes to cultivation?
But don’t worry good citizens, the Department of Consumer Protection (DCP) assures us there’s absolutely no need for concern about supply. They got this… They’re diligently reviewing the supply and market demand, you know, like a seasoned chef deciding how much salt to add to a pot of soup. Because clearly, that level of foresight is overrated, especially when handing out dispensary licenses.
Now, the pièce de résistance: the state’s recreational cannabis market grand opening on Jan. 9. Cue the confetti and fanfare! What could possibly go wrong? Oh, only the fact that the number of registered medical cannabis patients dropped faster than a lead balloon. Medical cannabis product sales took a nosedive, and suddenly, dispensary shelves looked as bare as a Black Friday sale bin.
But wait, there’s more genius at play. The state decides, in its infinite wisdom, to raise the purchase limit on recreational cannabis. Starting Dec. 1, customers can indulge in a shopping spree, grabbing a whole half ounce of raw flower or its equivalent per transaction, up from the measly quarter ounce limit. Because, let’s be honest, who needs responsible regulation when you can just pour more gasoline on the already blazing fire?
Now, let’s not forget the medical program, the unsung hero that paved the way for the extravagant spectacle of recreational use. It’s a tale as old as time – pioneers set the stage, only to be upstaged by the glitzy newcomers. The medical cannabis program, once the shining star, is now relegated to the shadows, like yesterday’s news or your favorite childhood toy left in the attic.
In the grand finale, Connecticut emerges as the visionary state that hopped onto the cannabis bandwagon without bothering to check if they had enough horses to pull it. Bravo! It’s a classic case of putting the cart before the horse, because who needs order and logic when you can revel in chaos?
So here’s a resounding cheer for you, Connecticut – a state that’s truly outdone itself this time. And to the medical cannabis patients, enduring the fallout, remember: it’s always darkest before the dawn. Or at least that’s what they say in the whimsical world of Connecticut’s cannabis escapade. Until next time, stay safe, stay sane, and brace yourselves for the next act in this circus.
Keep it weird. They definitely do…
